Troopers v Huntresses
by BloodGulchBlue
Summary: Somewhere in their weird journey from Sidewinder to Halo 2, a few Reds and Blues end up in Beacon. A rather hilarious (and one-sided) fight ensues. Rated M for language. One-shot.


**Author's note:**** Just a fun little idea that popped into my head. I know it has been done before, but what the hell!**

"What? Where are we?"

"Huh? Simmons? Sarge? Where are you?

"My parents told me I would go blind, but that was for a completely different reason!"

"Grif! I'm here!"

Team RWBY looked on as four figures in armour stumbled around their dorm. Where they had come from, they had no clue, but the huntresses were on edge. The one in the lighter blue armour staggered towards Yang, before tripping over a discarded textbook and falling on her chest. Enraged, Yang punched him into the far wall, Ember Celia ratcheting a shell into the empty chamber. The red one tripped over the fallen blue, knocking over the others. They began to argue, before reaching a slightly coherent line of speech.

"Where's O'Malley?"

"Church, I have no idea. All I remembered was that stupid weather machine in Lopez going off!"

"Did it blast us into the future or something? That's what I thought it would do. I wonder, is there any food?"

"Grif! How can you think of food at a time like this?"

"Shut up, Simmons!" The others chorused.

"Look girls. Are we going to kick these intruders out or what?" Weiss cut in.

"Huh?" Grif said, shaking his head, his vision finally clearing.

"Sure!" Ruby replied "I'll take the darker blue"

"The other blue's mine" Blake snarled. "No-one touched my girl"

"Looks like I will pick the red one" The heiress smiled.

"And I get the yellow one!" Yang announced.

"Yellow?" Grif cried "It's ORANGE! For the love of…"

Yang cut off his speech with a punch that sent him into the next room, empty due to the smaller student size for the year. She followed up with a series of shots which missed, but sent him flying back towards Yang. Taking the opportunity, she kicked out, hitting him in the groin. As Grif doubled over, she caught him with an uppercut that sent him crashing into the ceiling. As he fell back to the floor, Yang sent him flying back up with the shells in her clip, pummelling his armour. She spun round him as he slammed into the floor, standing over him, with a rather tempting target presented to her… Putting all her strength into the boot travelling inbetween the fork in his legs, Grif was sent flying back into the dorm, cashing into one of the beds. Simmons was wildly firing his battle rifle, attempting to counter the precise lunges of Weiss, who disarmed him quickly. He squealed and raised his arms.

"Don't! I bruise easily!"

Weiss stared at the cowering Red. Shaking her head, she punched his helmet, knocking him senseless to the floor.

Tucker squared off against Blake, Who drew Gambol Shroud, attaching the hilt to her ribbon.

"Oh, so you're into ropes and _that_ kind of stuff, eh? Well, let me tell you, I…"

"I'd rather not." Blake tersely cut him off, sending the pistol spinning at him. He ducked, before standing.

"You know, now you've thrown away your weapon, we can get down to…."

His attempt to pick up Blake was yet again thwarted by Blake pulling on the ribbon, leading Gambol Shroud to knock him to the floor as the weapon squarely connected to the back of his helmet.

"Oh, so you also like it rough" Tucker muttered before he fell unconscious.

Church retreated to the corridor as soon as the fighting broke out. He had somehow kept his sniper, and he lined up the shot, waiting for his prey to exit. Ruby ran out, looking in the opposite direction at first. Church opened fire, the shot cleanly missing the Huntress, taking a chunk out of the wall next to her.

"Fuck!"

He fired again, but Ruby was on the move, charging at him. His second shot hit the other wall

"Shit!" He cursed, before Ruby was on him. His third shot went straight up, bouncing off a light, then a door handle, before knocking Crescent Rose out of Ruby's hands.

"Ha!" Church crowed. "Did you see that!? I was awesome… Oh, crap"

All of team RWBY stood around him, weapons all aimed at him. Lopez appeared behind the team, energy shooting out at Church, and into the dorm. They disappeared with a _pop_. Very confused, the huntresses shared a look, just as a security team, headed by Ozpin and Goodwitch appeared at the scene of carnage.

"Well" Yang sighed "That was a thing"

As the sore Reds and Blues returned to… whatever the spirally place was, Church spoke up above Grif's quiet moans.

"Right, we don't mention this again. That was the most humiliating thing ever. Of all time"

"Somehow, I don't think our problems have ended" Tucker replied.


End file.
